Immaculee Ilibagiza and the Lesson of Forgiveness

Years ago I read the book "Left to Tell" by Rwandan Genocide Survivor Immaculee Ilibagiza.  In 1994, Immaculee watched her entire world fall apart.  Though she endured persecution for being a Tutsi, she never imagined that evil would consume  her nation, that her parents, siblings, even infant cousins would be slaughtered by her fellow countrymen.  For almost the entire genocide Immaculee hid in the bathroom of a Hutu Pastor with seven other women, and she could hear the killers right outside.  So many of the killers were her former friends and neighbors.  They knew her name, she could hear the looking for her.  She heard one of the killers screaming “I have killed 399 cockroaches, Immaculee will make 400.  It’s a good number to kill.”  Every day she heard the hateful chant: "Kill the Tutsis big and small, kill them, kill them, kill them all!”  
I could not even begin to understand Immaculee's fear, her anger.  To have to hide helplessly while your neighbors slaughtered your family just outside, wondering if each day would be her last on this Earth, it's unimaginable.  All she could do was pray, she knew that only God could save them, and that if she lost her faith, she would lose her will to live.  During many of her prayers should felt great hatred for the Hutu killers and the Hutu government who orchestrated this slaughter.  She became consumed with hate, she wanted the Hutus annihilated.  Even as she said The Lord's Prayer, she could not bring herself to say "As we forgive those who trespass against us."  It was at the time when the hate was overwhelming her when she heard a sinister voice whispering to her: "Don't call on God, He knows you're a liar.  How can you love God when you hate so many of his creations?"  

Realizing this, she began to pray to God, but now she didn't just pray for God to help her live, she prayed for God to help teach her how to forgive.  Now Immaculee's eyes began to open.  She started to see the killers as children, people who had been indoctrinated with hate from their youth.  Their minds had been infected with evil, and as a result, they didn't understand the wrong they were committing.  Their minds were infested with evil, but their souls were not evil.  Immaculee began to see that they too were God's children and prayed that their eyes would be opened before they were forced to account for their sins on the Day of Judgement.  She finally began to pray the very worlds that Jesus prayed when he was on the Cross: "Forgive them, for they know not what they do."  God never shows us something we aren’t ready to understand.  Instead, he lets us see what we need to see, when we need to see it.  He’ll wait until our eyes and hearts are open to Him, and then when we’re ready, He will plant our feet on the path that’s best for us, but it’s up to us to do the walking.  


As she continued to hide she felt Jesus speak to her in a dream and tell her that when she left her hiding place, almost everyone she knew and loved would be dead, but she will not be alone, He will be with her, and her family is with Him as well.  They have joy and peace.  Though Immaculee did feel her faith wane at times, she could still here Jesus speaking to her: “Mountains are moved with faith Immaculee, but if faith were easy, all the mountains would be gone.  Trust in me, and know that I will never leave you.  Trust in me, and you shall live.”  When the slaughter finally ended, Immaculee was left to try and find what was left of her family.  When she discovered the place where her brother Damascene was buried, she dug up his body so she could give him a proper burial.  She only found his torso, his head and limbs had been hacked away.  When she later went to a prison where some of the Hutu killers were being held, she saw the man who led the gang that killed her brother.  He was a Hutu businessman and Immaculee used to play with his children in primary school.  When she spoke to him, she did the last thing that anybody expected: she forgave him.  

Immaculee's extraordinary story has helped to inspire millions of people worldwide to forgive.  Many took Immaculee’s message to heart, forgiving those who hurt them, those they hadn’t spoken to in years because of this hurt.  Genocide survivors also found the strength to forgive their killers.  Immaculee even helped a Holocaust survivor find the strength to forgive the Nazis who killed her parents.  Immaculee helped many people, myself included, to understand that forgiveness isn’t reserved for the ones who deserve it.  God gives it freely, and we should do the same.  The one person you can set free from bitterness is you.  When one who harms you apologizes, it’s amazing but even if they don’t, at some point you’re going to have to let go of your anger or you’ll end up like the one that hurt you, and you’ll end up hurting the people that you’re supposed to love.  


Loving someone is kind of like offering forgiveness.  There’s no guarantee that they’re not going to hurt you again.  You cannot promise perfection, but you choose to love and you choose to forgive, because living in fear of being hurt is just a facsimile of life.  “God’s message extends beyond borders.  Anyone in the world can learn to forgive those who injure them.  However great or small the injury may be.”  


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